Monday I was watching a rerun of The View with President Obama as the guest. Joy asked President Obama if he still sits down with his family at the end of the day to discuss the ROSE and THORN of their day. I thought this was interesting because it puts life into perspective. You could be having what seems to be the worst day ever while you're actually going through it, but once the day is over if you sit back and think back on it there was probably SOMETHING that went right. Even if it was something as "insignificant" as a text message from an old friend just to say hello. That small gesture very well may be the rose amongst a thistle of thorns. I love that President Obama is instilling APPRECIATION into his daughters because so often we forget to appreciate...especially the small things.
So, i decided to incorporate "roses & thorns" into my life....hopefully it helps me to keep my eye steady on a positive target.
With break ups, a lot of times it's easy to feel like the bad is consuming you. Sometimes we have to step outside of ourselves in order to see that things aren't AS bad as we feel they are.
ROSE: for 3 years i was single. it wasn't always something that i loved but it was a necessary phase in my life. I was able to properly deal with all emotions from my previous relationship and I had a chance to fully understand all lessons I learned from it. 3 years of single living also led me to believe that a relationship was so out of my scope of vision that it would be dang near impossible for me to allow myself to become someone's girlfriend. I made up in my mind that my next REALationship would be the one that led me down that aisle. i was confident in this because i have been cautious with my heart. i don't let just anyone in. along came Cyrah.
here was the first man in over 5 years that i let in so easily. the first man that i actually wanted to let in and felt 100% comfortable doing so. i remember telling myself that "even if this doesn't work out, I am happy that he has helped me feel again". i said this not really expecting for this NOT to work out. *sigh* but nevertheless, FEELING again is my ROSE. my beautiful, beautiful rose. caring for someone, thinking of US and not me, giving myself freely.....LOVING. that is my rose. and no matter how i feel today, tomorrow, or next week...nothing & no one can take away what i felt when he kissed me. what i felt when i woke up next to him. what i felt when we loved. i won't let the bad in our relationship cause me to dismiss the good. i will hold on to that knowing that someday...i WILL feel that again. LOVE...you are my ROSE.
THORN: simply put, failure. i am absolutely terrified of heartache, i suppose that is why i hold my breath every time i feel sadness creeping to my surface. i refuse to feel that....even though i know it's there. #numb. my high expectations for this relationship are shattered and the obvious failure is a dreadful thorn in my side. i never wanted to be one of those girls who go through numerous heartaches and countless BS relationships....for nothing. i take pride in the fact that i am able to quickly learn from mistakes and not repeat them. i take matters of the heart seriously. as much as this break up pains my heart...the blow to my ego is almost AS devastating. Cyrah and Mia were supposed to last. we didn't. #failure.
what are your roses and thorns? i strongly urge that while you can, smell your roses daily before they wither & thorns are all you have left.
rose lei he made for me at my graduation....