DISASTERS IN DATING: fighting for love....

all i have ever wanted was someone that would fight for me.
ask me to stay.
show me that they want me as much as i want them.

i am tired of fighting for love.

i've never been this open. *sigh* here goes nothing.....

i chase my father.

i reach out to him. i call on him. i cry out for him.
and he never came....he never comes for me.

my dad never fought for me. never stayed for me. i always thought that if i loved him enough that he would love me enough.

never happened.

this is my daddy issue.

the one i thought i never had. but after 26 years i have finally discovered exactly what it is. i don't know how to change it, don't know how to conquer it.

i find myself loving too hard, loving too deep all in hopes of that person loving me juuuust enough.

i feel like im in a boxing ring fighting for love by myself.
packing bags of love, pretending to leave....wanting them to make me stay.

they let me go. they all let me go.

i love and i love and i love.
i open myself up, become vulnerable and get hurt.

im tired of fighting for love.

i want someone that will fight for me.
protect me.

because i am taking these gloves off, throwing in the towel....and stepping out of the ring.

love has beat me the fuck up.

im tired of fighting for love.



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