Tuesday, May 22, 2012

LIFE AND SUCH: it aint fair.....

the way that i love, it just aint fair. give and give and give. and what? i can't even complain because i would not be Mia without loving how i do. i do without expectation of that same thing being done in return. and i don't ask for much, maybe i should. at 26 years old....i find myself over it. what ever "it" may be. i tried. and i'm okay being done. because i truly tried. the games that are currently being played can continue on.....without me. God first. then Mia. if your list of priorities don't mirror that, i have nothing for you. i'm done making excuses for how i've been treated lately. it's not okay, bottom line. there will be no dramatic display of feelings upon departure. there will simply be no more trying. the lack of CARE in this current situation is something i have NEVER experienced. every single guy that has told me he LOVES me...has shown an awesome amount of CARE for me as well. i've NEVER had a guy "love" me and not truly have my best interest at heart. this is new and uncomfortable and it isn't fair. momentarily blinded to what has been right in my face....this aint fair. this aint right. and i told him before that how i feel will never change, that wasn't a lie. my FEELINGS toward him won't change....but my availability to him, patience with him?? those things have changed. Julian, i love you. you are not ready to provide what i require. let me go. xoxo, MiaMcK